November New Moon Energies

Happy New Moon! Oooweeee!! I love the Sagittarius Moon ūüĆö, and this one feels extra special . It is time to start the new path, the new walk, the new way. So on this New Moon bust out of the norm and do something different. Take a risk, throw caution to the wind and do something out of your ordinary. This is a huge act of power and salute to the new moon and new life you are creating.

Wear some bright red lipstick, change the colour of your hair or better yet…cut it, sign up for that class, make that website, take the new job offer, go on that date, maybe even end that relationship. Just change up the usual.

Whatever it is that you choose to do different, the energies feel like that are asking us to be brave and just do it. This is a time to make a bold act of power, this is to set in motion a new way of life and doing all that you do.

It’s exciting and overwhelming and exciting again ūüėä.

This moon cycle is about setting in motion the new life that is lurking around waiting to emerge. For me, my act of power I’m gonna post a video on my site and start the membership. It’s stretching out of my comfort zone or my norm and trying some new things on.

It’s easy to get overwhelmed in the how but stop yourself and just focus on doing it… raw, real, imperfect and pure. Just do it! That simple.

I invite you to write your act of power of your wish for the new on a bay leaf and burn it so the spirit world really receives in and you deeply honour the new form that is stalking and circling you in your life.

So share with me your act of power in the comments.

If you’d like to receive free soul connecting goodies, sacred feminine teachings, writing prompts and rituals I’d love it if you FOLLOWED THE BLOG. Some exciting things will be coming in the New Year.

Blessings and NEW moon!!




March New Moon Energy

Happy new Moon!! This cycle we are moving into awareness and evaluation of our relationships. Fun, fun, fun! This includes romantic relationships, friendships, work partnerships and family relationships .

It feels heavy and mucky and there’s a lot of unknown elements. For myself, my hubby and I have hit a rough patch. A boulder has crossed our path and we are a bit stuck at it. We’ve been going to counselling to sort out the layers of rubble that created the boulder and it’s not easy or fun. But it’s necessary for our union and mostly for our own individual growth.

He’s mirroring to me some dark spots and unhealed pockets I need to explore…own and heal. And I am doing the same for him. If we do not let ourselves stand in the flames of vulnerability, it’s easy to get defensive and deny or even blame the other. It’s raw and naked and scary as bleep!

But this is big big healing we (all of us ) are being asked to do and release. It is clearing away of the armour and guards of love that we have used as protection since the eons of time … but now the universe in Her glory asks us to surrender it down and move more fully into the radiant realms of love and trust.

It will not be an easy path but keep vision on the course. Ask yourself over and over…

What would love say ???

What would love do???

What would love think????

Truth be told, some relationships will disintegrate and dissolve into dust because the healing that is being asked of us is soul deep and some won’t be ready. And as hard as it will be, it will be ok. Just be in each moment of unknown on step at a time.

Maybe we’ve carried these fears for lifetimes or since childhood or since our last betrayal… but it is heavy and deep and the work is immense but I guarantee you, it will be life changing. It will change every aspect of how you experience your life. You will move into a deep trust and peace. This will shift so much into the world.

Try and trust and stay in the belief that healing will happen it whatever forms our binds take. Pray, envision, believe, speak, imagine and feel the universe caressing your heart as you walk the path of a healing soldier. Imagine what the healing will be and feel like and see it occur. Who’s there? What are you doing? How are things different ? How have things changed ?

On this new moon, take some time and honour this deep and humble healing time.

I honour you and your journey . And so it is ‚̧ԳŹ.



Teachings of the Duck For the September New Moon.

Image result for duck images

Happy New Moon!¬† Doesn’t a new moon always feel like a fresh, new beginning each month?¬† Well, this one is a fresh, new, grand beginning and a new way of life.

This is the time to take the chance.  This is the time to take action.  This is the time to do what you have always wanted to do.

So make the call, send in the resume for a new job, put an offer on a new house, make the choice for remodeling or adding on to your house…whatever it is…take that leap.¬† Make a change, take the new path…this is the time.

The last few days many, many groups of ducks have been visiting my yard.  We are talking like twenty at a time.  I feel they have been carrying the message for this Moon.

Duck symbolizes good luck and fortune.¬† It’s a time of preparation meeting opportunity creating good luck if we are prepared of course.

“If duck crosses your path to catch your attention for there are opportunities to explore. She reminds if you do not take swift action you will miss out. Do not procrastinate if you are interested.”¬† (http://dreamstop.com/duck-dream-symbol/)

This is a time not to focus on how it’s going to work, it’s simply a time of action and allowing the chips to fall where they may…trusting and knowing it will all work out as is.¬† All you have to do is explore the opportunity and take that chance and act upon your instincts, your inner knowing of what is calling and pulling at the strings of your heart.

There will be moments where we over think or worry or doubt…just let it blow away as it comes.¬† Just act and allow what is to come.¬† Act and follow the wind, follow the flow…follow your inner knowing. Time for a luscious new start.

On this New Moon, decide to take an action, a new start, a new class, a new date, a new car, a new house, a new job…a new opportunity of some sort.¬† That’s it…sit with it…envision it, know it in your bones.¬† Write it down and make a plan.

And so it is my friends.

As always I’d be so honored if you Followed My Blog or The Women’s Tribe Facebook Page.

Blessings and warmth and happy new changes as we enter the harvest season

ūüôā¬† xo





July New Moon Energy Forecast & Meditation

Y’all enjoying the new moon energy ??  This moon cycle feels like change is ahead.. a change in pattern.  There is a clearing… a letting go… a calling back of our power and a release of the behaviours that don’t serve our highest good. There’s also releases of relationships and changes to the way we act and feel and need within them.   We start to express ourselves more and really focus on ourselves.  We become centre stage of our lives and this is pivotal on our soul path. 

I found myself cleaning out closets today and organizing them, giving away clothes and returning plastic bags for recycling.  There’s a cleaning up going on.  We are creating more space for our Self to emerge in our lives.  There’s also a lot of inner shifting going on.   We feel done participating in lower energentic ways and patterns… enough is enough.  We will not stay in places and connections that no longer feed us or we will stand our ground and express the need for new patterns and forms to take shape and grow in the places we already embody and exist within. 

It’s an interesting point, its like we are in a pocket of clarity and divine focus.  We want our deepest selves in our lives… we are being called back and out of those distractions and roles and patterns that keep us separated from our own inner jewel.

This can cause turbulence during this moon cycle as we change and change our participation in some relationships or roles.  There may me push back or clawing at our feet to pull us back down to lower energy planes.  

Trust .  Participate.  Step forward one step at a time.

New moon practise to carry throughout the entire moon cycle ūüôā

A meditation for this months moon cycle.  Close your eyes… take in three to four deep breaths and exhale just as deeply.  Imagine it’s night time and you are sitting at a large fire.  It’s just dark sky and a giant fire in front of you.  An elder Native woman is there with you…she is there to guide and support you.  Imagine calling back all your power as though a bunch of luminous stars start floating back towards you and within you.  Feel how full and peaceful and confident it feels to hold all your own power.  You are strong and full of clarity!! Really let this feeling expand throughout your whole body !!  Let it expand into every cell of your being.  Feel your aura glow and expand.   Sit there and enjoy until you are ready to shift your attention back to your present space.
Happy New Moon!!



As always if you feel called I’d love it if you FOLLOWED MY BLOG ūüėė

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July New Moon Ritual – Tap into Your Feminine Energy

Happy New Moon!!!womb

What can you say about this new moon? The energies feel fresh, like a new pattern forming. Last moon’s full moon broke us free from the stuckness, we became un-tethered and in some ways we still are, but there’s a freedom, a newness, a brand new energy coming in as a result. ¬†Freedom….freedom….freedom!!!

This moon is a Cancer New Moon is about “initiating”. (Inspired by New Moon in Cancer: A New Step Forward. (http://www.collective-evolution.com/2016/07/03/new-moon-in-cancer-a-new-step-forward/¬†) ¬†It’s also about family, love,connection, emotion, water, intuition…the feminine side of life.

“Initiating”…this word really stung me. Initiating the changes, the healing, the life force energies waiting for you to direct them. ¬†There is still healing we are doing, still conversations and new directions to take but we have certainly got the ball rolling and good on ya’.

I sit here at 38 weeks pregnant, waiting, hoping for my baby to arrive. ¬†Today seems like a beautiful day for that..the new moon. ¬†Time will tell ūüėČ

I can not wait, I’m buzzing with anticipation and excitement and yet I know the labour will be a painful transition but the new life, new love, the new form, the new family patterns await. ¬†This feels quite symbolic to what we are going through spiritually, emotionally, intellectually and even physically as healing beings on this planet. We are in process of birthing new life forms and patterns but there is still some actions we must keep initiating to support our transition into new healing territory.

So enjoy this new moon filled with the energies of family, with love, connections, our wombs. Hone in on your emotional, creative and intuitive energy to guide you. ¬†I read somewhere that we are being brought from our heads to our wombs on this New Moon so I invite you into a gentle ritual to honor this shift ūüôā



Close your eyes, take some deep, relaxing breaths and see a safe, healing, loving place in your mind’s eye. ¬†Just go with whatever comes first. Feel the temperature there, see the colors, hear the sounds, smell the smells. Breathe it in. Relax and allow your environment to soothe you like a gentle, loving hug from the Great Mother herself. ¬†Imagine your womb, your sacred life vessel transformed into a healing guide that represents your creativity, your emotions, your feminine side of Self. ¬†See this being walking towards you and sitting beside you. Greet this being with love. What do you notice about this part of you? What qualities or aspects stand out? ¬†What questions do you have for your feminine self? ¬†Let this being answer. ¬†What does the healing guide want to tell you? ¬†Offer thanks and love at the guide’s visit when you are done. ¬†Do you want to give the healing guide and gift? ¬†If so, do so and notice what it is. ¬†Hug, shake hands or send some well wishes as you end your conversation and make plans to visit again. ¬†Gently come back into the room, feel your feel, wiggle your hands and toes and journal about your discoveries.


When your ready draw or doodle your image, or vision. Journal about what came. Did you give your guide a gift?  What was it?  What do you imagine it means?  Ask it if you need to.  Allow any new insight to emerge and form some luscious new intentions for this moon cycle to get clear on this New Moon.

As always, if you feel called or connect to my writing I’d love it you Followed My Blog or The Women’s Tribe Facebook Page. ¬†Blessings y’all.

And so it is



Image:  thegoldenlightchannel.com




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May New Moon Ritual & Celebration

may moon2This New Moon feels like a welcome celebration, doesn’t it?   Last moon/month was INTENSE!  The month was filled with crisis, change, upheaval, chaos, things falling apart and reaching a point of climax.  We had no choice but to change out of old, wounded, uncertain patterns of our past, life brought forth change, growth, endings, destruction, etc. so we could begin anew or at least start upon a new path, a new pattern, a new, loving, authentic way of being.  Bridges collapsed into the old way of life and this month is about allowing new roads to take shape and reveal themselves.  We are planning out new actions, new life, a taking the first step or two in beginning this re-birth and restructuring.

This moon/month is about doing things a little different.¬† Trying new things, taking action, responsibility, and finally addressing what we have always postponed ourselves in addressing.¬† We shine the flashlight on our dark bits and look at them so we can heal them.¬† This will take courage, vulnerability and strength but you have those qualities within you….yes you do!

It feels like even though the crisis and chaos/ peak moments have occurred and shattered what was, we are now in the process of planning out how to take action to rebuild, restructure, re-do some old ways.    This is a great thing on the soul level, even though it may feel like total crap.  This is truly a healing time.


On this New Moon in Taurus I invite you to throw a New Moon party.  It can be  a party of one or like for me, a party of 3, the hubby, my son and myself.  The intention, to indulge in some physical senses and luxuries.  So after all the tough stuff last moon, now is the time to nurture ourselves and feed ourselves love and enduring self-care energy as we trek upon new territory.  Why not make it a magical evening, a date night with the Moon if you will.

So, tonight have a luscious meal, buy a lovely bottle of vino, or make some dessert.¬† Take a walk or hike, move your body, do some yoga, go for a bike ride…really ignite your physical senses.¬† Celebrate this moon like it were a marker of your new road, new chapter, new way of life.¬† Somehow, some way, have some conscious, New Moon fun.¬† List some ideas you have, some actions you will take this month to move forward into new patterns and out from the old.¬† It might be setting boundaries, or finally signing up for a class or exploring ways to leave a relationship.¬† Whatever it is, list it, put it into consciousness, even it‚Äôs a simple exploration or evaluation of what you are still unsure about.

But tonight, you celebrate.  Celebrate the beginning of a new cycle. You made it through last month.  Indulge your senses.  Toast the moon, toast each other, toast yourself.  Taste the cake, feel the bubbles in the bath, let the wind sweep though you like it were a caress from the Goddess herself.

Tonight…all you need is enjoyment! Find your way there and share ūüôā

Happy New Moon.

astrology, ceremony, new moon, Uncategorized

Aries New Moon Ritual.

new lifeHere we are at the Aries New Moon. ¬†A new astrological year. ¬†It is said it’s also a super moon, so this one feels more intense than usual.

The energies at this juncture are interesting. ¬†I’m full of piss and vinegar, I want to get stuff done, get stuff going, get things off the ground. I’m spring cleaning (more releasing and getting rid of stuff) like crazy. ¬† ¬†It could be a nesting phase but it’s also energetic I’m prepping, changing and clearing old energies for new ones.

I have 3 Spirit Masks I’ve made, all very similar. Dark blue with stars, feathers, sparkles…and I feel the urge to burn them..to transcend them from a separate entity of me to an embodiment within me as they turn to ash. ¬†This is what this New Moon is calling of us…TRANSCENDENCE…CHANGE…it’s an invocation from the dark to light!

Yet there is still some darkness tonight, some aching of an old wound. ¬†I’m going to be re-entering the place I was most wounded in my life. ¬†When I had my son over 6 years ago, my world as I knew it collapsed. ¬†My marriage ended in a traumatic way, I lost my house, my dogs, everything that surrounded me collapsed and crumble. It all died.

And here I am about a couple months away from birthing again. ¬†I’ve rebuilt my life. ¬†I have a new marriage, a new house, a new way of doing everything about my life. ¬†It is 100% more authentic, built from my soul bones and yet the memory of the old pain, the trauma, the severe wounding lingers. ¬†My wounded self, my ego wonders if it will happen again. ¬†Will it crumble this time? ¬†Will I make it through? ¬†What does marriage and children look like in peace and calm and not survival and earth shattering loss?

It calls my vulnerability forth, the raw ache and memory of what happened but the fear envelops me and eats me alive like a savage beast. ¬†I want re-assurance, a guarantee, I want safety and perfection of my husband and that is not fair. ¬†I feel like I’m padding up with memory foam and duck taping it to every limb on my body. ¬†I want us to be perfect, to communicate like professionals, to never be cranky or impatient, to live in this illusionary safe bubble of perfection so the possibility of me having to go through another life collapse feels smaller. ¬†It is not a great way, it is the fearful way. It is taking it’s toll on me and on him.

This New Moon, feels like a call forward.  A howl from Grandmother Moon herself asking me to peel off the padding, release the fear and walk forward, onward in faith, in trust both in myself and my husband.

“What if you put the sword down?” she whispers to me.

What if I did walk forward with a knowing that it will be okay, whatever happens. ¬†I’m sure it will be totally fine but I do know too that I can make it regardless of what happens. ¬†I am one strong cookie and the universe, the Grandmothers, the lucky stars…they all have my back. Creation, love, the Earth Mother, they all got me and so does my husband. ¬†I just need to stop swinging my sword in anticipation of doom and of death.

The reality is this…I am bringing in LIFE! ¬†That is what this Aries New Moon, this first New Moon of the zodiac is about… LIFE!! ¬†What do you want in your life?? ¬†Remove the cloak of doom and see LIFE!!!

ARIES NEW MOON RITUAL:fortune teller

Light those candles, ignite your incense, invite over a friend or two and get out your paper and pens. ¬†It’s time to dream, to go to the depths and beyond, the other worlds and invoke our lives with NEW LIFE. ¬†So here we go…

Imagine that you are a Seer, a magical, intuitive Seer. ¬†You can see the life you want for the next year, the best things will happen, everything you want occurs….tell me what do you see???? ¬†How are these things occurring, what are you doing to help them along? ¬†(Listen, she will tell you ) ūüôā

Ready, set go…write it out just float to the clouds with your pen.

At the end of your reading with yourself as Seer, your magical, intuitive, goddess self gives you a rock with a symbol on it.  What is the symbol?  What does it mean for you?  Grab a marker and a rock and make it come alive!!!

When you are done, imagine returning to your own body.  Grab a stone or rub your feet on the ground.

Share with your friends or post here ūüôā

Happy Astrological New Year, and a year FULL OF LIFE and JOY!! And so it is.




If you feel called, do feel free to FOLLOW THE BLOG of Like The Women’s Tribe Facebook Page. ¬†ūüôā ¬†Blessings friends.

Picture 2 – from Pinterest.


A Letter to the Great Mother for the New Moon.

great motherWe have an Aquarius New Moon, a watery, emotional, soul quenching time to dive into our depths and ignite our souls. ¬†The soul path is singing to us, can you follow the sound of the song even though you don’t know where the trail shall lead? ¬†This is living with your instincts, trusting, following, being guided by Spirit. ¬†The Sacred Feminine is awakening and beginning her Howl. ¬†We have shed the shit out of the old now is the time to surrender, follow and trust in the new that is not yet in form but in motion. ¬†The seeds have been planted but not yet sprouted, can you patiently await to see what comes and trust you will be supported?

On this day and night of the New Moon, you know the drill. ¬†Take some Sacred Time, light some candles, burn some incents, play some soft music or wild feminine drums and write your soul blood onto the pages. ¬†This moon, I invite you to write a letter to the Great Mother, the Sacred Feminine, The Goddess…She in any form. ¬†Bear your soul. ¬†Tell her about what you’d like to do in your life, your wild, alive dreams that are rambunctiously beckoning at you from within. ¬†You feel the pecks of the wild call like little birds tapping their beaks at you ferociously for food. ¬†Just see what comes. ¬†This letter for me is deep, is soul-bearing is something I held tight to my heart for a good week now, and today I finished it. ¬†So I invite you to write to Her, our Sacred Mother and bear your sweet soul. ¬†Share your wishes, your struggles, and that what excites you or is calling you and know her arms wrap you and your life like a squishy, large, bosomed grandmother hugging you to your depths. ¬†It is a time of brand new beginnings after and whole lot of shedding. ¬†And so it is my dear friends.

Below is my letter to the Great Mother. ¬† As always feel free to FOLLOW THE BLOG if she calls to you and Like The Women’s Tribe FB page.

Xo Crystal


To the Great Mother, Goddess, Divine Feminine.

I understand you had to facilitate the end of my job.  I get that I finally had to let it go. I had no choice, my time was up.  It was time for the decision to be made.  I hear you whisper to me to simply let it go, something else is brewing, my health and my job just could not exist together.  

There’s an element of surrender you are asking from me, I see that, and yet I struggle to bow down and curtsy¬†to you. ¬†I know, I know‚Ķ.I must, there is no other choice. ¬†On top of my health, I am with child now. ¬†I certainly cannot risk the health of my child. ¬†You knew this and dropped the surprise into my womb. ¬†You knew I’d risk my own health out of fear of dropping my old professional role, so you helped me and anointed my womb with a life I would not offer any risk of harm.

As much as I trust your plan Great Mother, I am struggling in my shedding. ¬†I feel like this final badge of honor that I was so desperately holding was the last petal that fell off and my old life is now completely gone. ¬†I’m left with just myself, my stem, my roots and my uncertainty of what life is without all my bright, shiny petals surrounding me. I doubt my worth and it‚Äôs making me have to look into the insecure mirror.

‚ÄúMirror, mirror on the wall what the hell makes me worthy if all my petals are gone?‚ÄĚ

As I gaze into my reflection, I see my fear wanting to reach for the fallen pieces of flower so I can glue them back on. ¬†I’m used to being that flower, that bright, colorful flower. ¬†And now I’m without any petals of definitions or badges of worth. ¬†I’ve put all my marbles into the petals, believing they made me something. ¬†I am this title, this role and I have this purpose and therefore I am good enough and I have value. ¬†That job, that title meant I made something of my life, I succeeded, I became something. ¬†And now…it’s gone. ¬†I’m stripped down to my bones, my soul bones and have come to a cross-road. ¬† I’m walking out into the world title free and it’s rattling me to the Core. ¬†I feel weak in my knees, thin skinned, skeletal like.

I’ve fought hard for the Feminine, the Sacred Feminine to find it’s place at the throne alongside the masculine here in the physical world and it has been a battle. ¬†I have fought hard but always kept my foot in the masculine world, to feel accepted, deemed okay, able to fit it.¬† My jobs were part of this.¬† My jobs allowed this and yet they were the same place I lost my connection to my soul.¬† I always knew I was not doing my soul‚Äôs work there, I felt like I was doing what was responsible and I accepted that.¬† Now, I feel like you are testing me and challenging me to see if I can walk my talk. Can I move in to my wild, feminine self and take it out to the world fully, not half assed.¬† You have cut my safety nets.

Here at am at the fork in the road.

“Can I fully believe that the Feminine is equally important, worthy and valuable in a world that doesn’t yet celebrate it? ¬†Can I walk out of my house day after day and not get a single ego stroke for an external accomplishment? The bigger question, can I stroke my own soul and embrace and celebrate and honor the inner beauty, the feelings, the art, the expressions, the soul connections and the love that I leak out in the world and feel like this is enough? ¬†Can I place equal value in my Beingness that I did in my doingness?”

I know that it will take a lot of work.  Getting external validation is like an ego boosting drug.  It will take truck loads of self-belief and a strong will.  I have to be for myself what I have sought out of others.  I will have to be my own love drug.  I have to give myself the love I have desperately needed out of others.

Phewf, is there a course on this‚Ķhaha!¬† You know I’ve always felt a bit different in this world, like I don’t quite fit in, and now you are asking me to not only accept this but relish in it? ¬†I know I don’t care about things like my eye brow shape or having the perfect lip liner, or Botox or the best clothes. I often buy used clothes. ¬†

For some reason I was made to be soul oriented, not image oriented. I care about the trees, the Earth, the Sun and the Wind. ¬†I love the nights when the moon shines bright. I love solitude and reflection and making art for no purpose other than to express myself. ¬†I’m deep, emotional and intense (people don‚Äôt always like this). ¬†I want to talk soul purpose, darkness, pain, struggle, wonder, enchantment, magic and mystery, not new kitchen gadgets. ¬†I want to stare at the stars for hours and get lost in the night sky instead of going to the newest hot spot.

You know Great Mother, I felt like I do now once before at the age of thirteen. I had no great mother 2understanding of you but I felt the remembering of you in my blood.  I craved for your touch, your caress, your presence in my life like a child for her mother but I could not find you.  I could hear you call to me but I could not find my way to you.  Nobody showed me the path or taught me the way home to your presence.  I did not have the words or understanding of being without you in my life I only felt the despair, the emptiness, the lack of feeling okay.  I desperately wanted the ache of living without you to be seen, to be heard, to be understood and named.  But nobody knew of you or share you with me so I became the problem, not the world that denied you.  My eating disorder, my lack of coping, my short-comings needed development.  I became pissed off, I rebelled, I acted out my longing for your Sacred, for belonging, for being seen and I self-harmed, I smoked, toked and drank the booze to fill the emptiness.  I acted out my despair of living without you for living without you meant having to live without myself.

I see now, in this moment it was my journey.  It was the road I had to take to come back to the un-cloaked and un-titled soul that I was then and am again now. Life has stripped me down back to the raw, real, vulnerable soul that I was at thirteen, before I masked and imaged myself up.  

There are no distractions, no roles or personas or hats I’m wearing to cover up anymore. ¬†I can¬†see in this exact moment that I had to go through all that pain and addiction and acting out so I would have to seek out healing. ¬†Healing allowed me to figure out what the hell I was feeling and unconsciously expressing. ¬†I got to discover that I was born with the remembering of the Sacred Feminine within me and my path of healing was the place I was going to give birth to its‚Äô existence in my life. ¬†In my healing I discovered an understanding of things I had felt but never understood. ¬†I learned how to free myself of eon old pain by remembering the you, the Sacred Feminine and inviting you to paint my life back into aliveness.

I had to learn how to be my own parent, healer, and best friend so I could prepare myself for this moment of soul return and walk a new path in a world that may not get or support it.  I had to ally myself up with my own love and acceptance and believe in you, the Great Mother to support, hold me and nourish me as I plunge in my feminine depths.

In some ways it’s easier to fit in, to walk the common path and belong. ¬†It’s easier in the sense that you get support, validation and celebration for checking off all the “successful adult” boxes or get recognition and celebration for looking a certain way.¬† You get to swim with the other fish rather than against them.

Yet for me, it’s far more painful and gut wrenching to live in an inauthentic manner. ¬†My soul begins to quiver and shrivel up like a snail laced with salt. ¬†As it begins to fade away the despair, the depression, the doom and the anxiety circle me like a bunch of crows to a dead carcass on the side of the road. Living without my own self-connection and in alignment with my wild, feminine soul is a life of addiction and is massive self-destruction. ¬†I cannot do it. ¬†Death would take my hand if I did. ¬†And I have not wanted to accept this. ¬†I have wanted to change the norm, to challenge the norm, rather than being faced with the task of living a different life, on the lonely trail of the non-norm.

I have nothing left but to keep following my spirit lead instinct and make a new trail, make a new life in the bushy, dark, jagged trail that waits to be touched and cleared.  This is my purpose.   Sigh*!

Do I wish my purpose was as linear as becoming an accountant or nurse or pavement maker.  Yes!!!! I wish it was wrapped with such a pretty, titled bow.  But for some reason my purpose is not that describable or that easily coined.  I cannot put it on a business card. I cannot name it in one word.

I can only be brought back to you Great Mother and thus myself, over and over. Can I love myself enough to be wildly different and live un-boxed? ¬†Can I be an artist of life, or a lover of Creation, a magician, an expressionist or even a beauty maker rather than a Home Care Case Coordinator and be okay with that? ¬†Can I give up my fancy titles and follow my wild spirit because this is what life is asking of me in this moment even though others will challenge me to grab a role? ¬†It feels big, un-contained and un-packaged and it’s uncomfortable, yet dare I say exciting?!

Can I believe in Creation, in Spirit, in Divinity, in you Great Mother and just follow the off- beat call of the wild? All I can do is try, experience it all and share.  I can only dive into the magic and the darkness, the pit of loneliness that feels like my life is at times and trust that somehow this is my soul path.

I have one of those birthday books that tell you about yourself based on the date of your birth and the title of mine is called, “The Lone Wolf.” ¬†How fucking fitting!


So here I am, a flower without it’s petals but still alive, still with a solid stem and roots. I wonder if anyone ever appreciates the stem of a flower or how the roots keep it alive. ¬†It’s funny how when you are most yourself you risk being the most unseen, the most in-validated. ¬†Being this vulnerable, real, raw is not so much seen as brave and courageous as much as it is seen as a nuisance and instability…hahaha! ¬†That kind of makes me laugh for I connect most to those who have made beautiful sculptures out of the shit life dealt them.

And so I trek on, back to the point on the trail I left when I was thirteen with a hell of lot more knowledge and self-respect and courage to walk onto my path as a feeler, a loner, a color and magic inducer and a sharer of it all.

I howl on…


The Lone Wolf…




Photo sources:

Photo 1-lightgrid.ning.com

Photo 2 –¬†valerielenton.wordpress.com


A New Moon and a Call for New Energy!

new moonThis new moon is a bit intense, powerful, full of action, robust change, movement.  However, it is also summoning the webs in the closet.  The old demons and addictions to stuckness so to speak.  We must come face to face with it and clean that shit out.

We’ve waited, held the dream, the questions, the visions in our hands. We’ve circled it time and time again, getting to know it, understand it. We’ve planted the seeds and waited for them to germinate into something. ¬†We’ve done our due diligence and waited patiently, even when it was tough, even when we didn’t want to or when patience seemed impossible. ¬†I’ve shed a many tears trying to trust in Divine time and wondering if I’d simply be in the stuckness forever as a new way of life.

Now the time has come, to get out of the mud, to put our butts in 4 by 4 and take action. We start watering and weeding the dream and pull off the dead flowers as it continues to grow.

This month is really about summoning our own inner authority, our own leader and cultivator. ¬†We move into the masculine side of our brains, logic, rational, planning, movement, and action. ¬†We summon our inner king, the inner master to lead us, to guide us on the trail. ¬†We allow ourselves to be directed by this part, this authoritative, even dominating part to shake us out of our limiting shackles of self-sabotage, our doubts and our insecurities. ¬†Now is the time we rise,we discover, we begin forward movement. Maybe it’s just small steps but alas its forward movement.

Today I moved a plant that has sat on my altar for years. ¬†It holds my placenta from when I birthed my son along with words of my dream, my soul’s purpose. ¬†I moved into my living room, it was calling me to move it, it felt restless on the altar. ¬†Now it is in my life, my everyday life, not just on my Sacred altar and in the dream. ¬†So play around with your altar or even special pieces of ornaments or furniture in your home. ¬†Move the energy around. ¬†I also painted the walls in my living room after almost 2 years of wanting to. ¬†I just woke up one day and had enough of the old colors. ¬†These small changes are igniting other small changes. ¬†My son wants to paint his room so we are planning for that, I want to paint the kitchen as well. ¬†The feel in my home is changing, the stagnation and inertia is shifting out, drifting away like a dark rain cloud.

On this New Moon cycle can you invite in simple, small changes that are like sacred acts in your life. ¬†Maybe it’s small changes like¬†changing your internet provider so you can do better quality Skypeing, which can lead to more clients or cleaning out your desk to more organized and stir up new ideas. ¬†Maybe it’s moving around some rocks or flowers or plants so the energy is different.

I feel the need to clean today, I mopped my floors, cleaned my altar, did some laundry.  Just a real gathering and focusing of energy. So play around with the energy in your home and allow that to translate in your life.

For me I feel that some good things are being set in motion, some new starts, some new projects, new hopes are in action. I’ve even started some new test protocols for my health condition that perhaps can lead me on a new trail! The wheel of momentum has started to turn and it’s exciting, lots of momentum is building here during this moon cycle.

So on this lovely New Moon, grab some pen and paper, light a candle, an incense stick and let’s get writing. ¬†I feel a whole lot of emotions lately, things are prickling at me, the mood, the feel is emotional, uncomfortable, lots of inner rattling occurring for release.

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New Moon Writing Exercise. writing

Following the guidance of some tarot cards, we’ve got two major players (inner parts or archetypes) within us duke-ing it out. ¬†One of them is the king, our own inner authority, commander, chief operating officer of our soul plan. ¬†This part of us is a warrior, an action player, a movement initiator. ¬†And then we have the self-sabotager/ doubter. ¬†This is the part of us that likes to play on our own dark emotions and get addicted to inertia. ¬†It is rebellious, child-like, the part of us who wants to whine and throw pity parties filled with excuses on the wall. ¬†So let’s duke it out on the page we can heal and clear this part of us filled with doubt, uncertainty and insecurity.

Imagine sitting in between these two parts of yourself, as though the all to familiar internal battle was sitting with you at the table.  The Saboteur and the King on opposite sides of you.  Write the following questions or create your own and just let the pen flow.  Here are my examples, feel free to use them or add your own.

“Why do you sabotage my efforts?” I ask the¬†SELF-SABOTAGER part of me.

I feel doubtful, crabby, uncertain, unsure. ¬†I’m pissy in my stuckness. ¬†I want to rebel, just have a tantrum and sulk in the sand. ¬†I doubt that I will succeed so I throw up roadblocks, I procrastinate, I lose my focus out of protection. ¬†I protect myself from the failure. ¬†I’m afraid to fail. I’m afraid to be made a fool, so I don’t show up, I drift, I get unfocused. ¬†It’s what I do. ¬†Then it’s not really about failure, it’s about not trying. ¬†I don’t feel confident, I don’t trust myself to win, to follow through, to show up for the battle. I’m a loser, a weak, unfocused failure, so I fuck up before I can fail. ¬†I protect you from failing.

How can I get you to lead Mr. King?

Allow me to, follow me no matter what. ¬†Trust in me. ¬†Trust that I will lead you to a success battle, that we will win the war because I am so strong, I am so confident, experienced. ¬†Believe in me. ¬†Believe in my abilities and successes. ¬†Believe in my strength, believe in my force, my power, my focus, my ability to vision and fight in the war. ¬†I am the chief and I take that seriously, it is the biggest job I have ever had and I don’t take it lightly. I will lead you to freedom, I will lead you to success and prosperity. ¬†You just need to choose to believe in me, trust in me as your leader. ¬†I will succeed for you but if you choose to follow me, I expect you to be all in. ¬†I will not let you fail, I’ll be hard on you because I believe in you. ¬†I will call on you to fight, to focus to put in all you’ve got, the most amount of effort you can offer in the battle. ¬†All you have to do is choose to follow me and believe in my guidance. ¬†I will lead you to victory, I assure you. ¬†I am positive about this.

I choose the King, I choose to risk, to take a God damn chance and walk the tight rope anyways.  So what if I fail, I friggen tried.  So I will follow the King that speaks to my inner hunches, my gut instincts, the call and will to do something and move forward.  My agitation is high lately and that is the King rallying the troops, calling me to action, to get off my butt and do something.  So I honor the King and I follow his lead.  He is commander in chief right now and I will follow his orders.  I will draw upon his archetypal strength and fight the good fight, I will take the battle ground and do the work, fight hard for what I want through action, not wishy washy dreaming.  And so it is!

Who will you choose to follow during this moon cycle? Who will lead you from within?  When the saboteur shows up can you look for the king?  Can you shift into trust, into full blown belief in him and in yourself and follow his lead.  Even imagine him guiding you throughout the moon cycle.  If you feel unsure, or stuck imagine talking to the King on the page and respond as the King to yourself.  Just get out of the way and let your warrior guide you with the magic of your imagination.

Enjoy this month of clearing, healing and new cycles of self-belief, self-trust, assurance and confidence.

And so it is friends!


Crystal Tardiff Chagnon

Photo source:  www.foreverconscious.com


New Moon & Mercury Retrograde Ritual – Weaving the Old & New.

may moonWe start this New Moon with a Mercury Retrograde. ¬†It’s a time usually marked by new beginnings but with Mercury going backwards, it encourages us to look behind us, in our pasts to assist with the new. ¬†It encourages us to look at our own past, to explore the old ways of being, our inner caverns, our darkness, our parts yet to be healed and the road we’ve walked. ¬†It also invites us to reflect on the old, maybe old jobs, old relationships, old friendships or aspects of our lives so they can give us wisdom for the future. ¬†This offers us new eyes, or old eyes depending, how you see it.

I pulled a tarot card for this New Moon and it is so fitting. ¬†It is called the Spiritual Strength card from the Psychic Tarot Oracle Cards. ¬†It says, “This card is coming forth to give you encouragement and remind you that you have the inner strength to complete whatever you have been working on. ¬†This final Spirit Card represents courage, discipline, stability, and persistence. ¬†You may be tired or weary from the struggle, but now is not the time to give in. ¬†Instead, tap into all of you inner reserves for that one final push to achieve the desired outcome…”

This is quite fitting with the retrograde occurring just after the New Moon as retrogrades are known to cause some communication issues. ¬†It is said not to start new adventures during the retrograde as they will be met with many challenges, delays, obstacles, struggles… ¬†I’m in the middle of a large project and have been feeling a little stuck and upon this New Moon/ Mercury Retrograde I feel the need to sit with my past, to embody it, like it were it person and here what it has to tell me. ¬†How can I blend the past lessons into my future, into my journey here, as my future, and this large project (a book) as it is taking shape. ¬†weaving

How can my past give me clues and an answer on how to move forward now and onward? I feel like I’ve been trying to weave an immaculate quilt of a book and at times I get stuck and remember that I don’t know how to weave. ¬†But this retrograde and New Moon allows for a return and exploration of the old, like it will open my memory banks and allow me to keep weaving with new understanding, new clarity, new ways of exploring and approaching what is at hand, simply by sitting with and combing through some old moments in time.

New Moon & Retrograde Ritual

So on this New Moon and Retrograde, I invite you to sit with your past.  Light some candles, some inscents, get out your journal and pens and imagine your past sitting beside as a person, a guide, here to teach you and offer you new insight into the present.  Ask your past that sits beside you in the chair,

“How can you give me some ideas on how to move forward?

What perspective do you have to share about my current situation or endeavor?

What would you like me to remember and carry forward with me as I keep going?”

Just set your timers for 6 minutes for each question and let your pen run wild with intuitive guidance.  Do not lift that pen and just journey inward, into the gates of the old where golden nuggets of the past will guide you forward and onward.

This month feels like a solid integration and weaving of many things. ¬†In some ways, it feels like we will finish the quilts, or at least get clear on how to, it will be done. ¬†During this moon cycle if we simply keep weaving, keep going, keeping pushing forward we will achieve our soul’s call. ¬†Allow the old to be weaved into the new, like it guided the fibers home, into where the needed and wanted to be.

And so it is…

Happy Weaving ūüôā

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