Reading this shot an arrow into my heart. I struggled with eating disorders and an addiction to perfectionism for many years. I was obsessed with being the best at everything I did like it were a drug that kept my sense of worth and value out of withdrawal. I didn’t believe who I was was enough or quite frankly even important. It’s not because I had bad parents its’ because we live in a culture that only celebrates success, achievement and accomplishment and when you are solely seen for your actions and endeavors you get a complex. We all want recognition and validation. We all want to be seen and heard and appreciated. Why does it need to come in the form of a success?
Let’s change this for ourselves and for our children. Let’s “bask in the beauty” of ordinary. I love that!
We don’t celebrate the ordinary, simple, beautiful aspects of being. Nobody celebrates your messy cooking process (which I call my creativity in the kitchen) or your sweet gentle soul rubbing the backs of your children before they go to sleep each night. Let’s do that! Let’s celebrate our ordinary ways of being. Let’s even celebrate our mediocre skills. It’s uniquely, wonderfully you. I suck at laundry, and I can own it, laugh at it and just enjoy that fun, quirky fact.
When I was doing some intense healing work on myself I forced myself to step out of perfectionism box by having a goal to not try and be the best and I forced myself to not try my best because my best was full tilt, way past my limits and a give all to get all kind of approach. I’d lose my balance, my well-being, my marbles…just to end up on top and feel like I was enough. I was foaming at the mouth for a sense of worth and esteem. So I set my sights on a new target….I wanted to be middle of the pack. I didn’t want to be the best, instead be average. It was freeing, I actually starting enjoying what I was doing. I could take a run with no time limits or distance markers to accomplish, I could just move my body and run freely. It brought me back in my body, in the moment, in the experience and not the outcome. I could play baseball and drop the ball without feel ashamed or embarrassed, I could be gentler and laugh. My success was no longer my lifeline and it allowed fun to move in.
But hoowahhhh! It was also tough. It allowed my true wounds and holes to emerge so I could heal them, not soothe them with a medal or academic achievement. That’s when true and lasting change happened.
So today, let’s celebrate our ordinariness, our average skills or aspects of the self. Let’s celebrate the ordinary things we do each day that perhaps are not celebrated or recognized and shift the idea that who we are is what we do. Our beingness, our intimate connections, our soul connections are just as, if not more important, in the world than what we do. People will remember who you were, how you made them feel, your qualities, not what you did in this life.
Celebrate your ordinary. Own it like a beautiful new scarf and flaunt it for us. Share what you’ve got. Find at least 8 wonderfully, beautiful ordinary things about yourself and shine the light on it: Your beingness is just as important in the word, the unseen, unnoticed things that make the world go round. Start celebrating for yourself and see what happens 🙂
Here’s a few aspects of my beautiful ordinary:
1) I try and paint beautiful pictures but truthfully, I’m not that great at it. It’s fun trying!
2) I’m messy in the kitchen when I cook and have learned to call it my creative process and taught my husband to call it the same 😉
3) I thrive in organized chaos, my work desk is always this way.
4) I love going for walks in the woods with my son, it’s simple and ordinary and awesome.
5) I let my son beat me more often than not at Trouble or card games.
6) I’m romantic, I buy flowers and write notes to my husband on rainy days and Mondays.
7) I hate cleaning, I’d way rather cut the grass or shovel the driveway, heck even take out the garbage.
8) I pretend I’m a world famous singer and lip sync like a bat out of hell while I cook supper. Pink has because my alter ego.
It’s your turn…
If you feel called to do so, add your email and follow the blog to get notifications on tools, rituals and sacred art tasks to feed your Divine Feminine soul 🙂
This is Day 17 of the 30 Day Challenge 🙂